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Removing toxicity, whether from toxic relationships (significant other, friends, coworkers, etc.), a draining job, or other negative influences, is crucial for your mental health. It’s important to identify these points of irritation in our lives if we are to prioritize our mental and emotional well-being. Once the energy-stealing, life-sucking leech(es) have been identified, removing these sources of drama and negativity can lead to personal growth and a renewed sense of happiness. And who doesn’t want more of that?
Disclaimer Note
If you are in an emergency situation, if there is concern for your life, or you are being abused, the advice in this article is not meant for you. LEAVE that situation immediately! Do not try to reason or discuss anything with that person, just leave and get somewhere safe.
If you are in a job that has asked you to do something illegal, I would suggest walking away from the job as soon as possible…like right after they ask you do the illegal thing. If they want you to do something that you’re not comfortable with (even if it is technically legal), voicing your concerns about it is absolutely acceptable, and preferred, over just walking out on the job.
Toxic Signs to Look for
There are many signs you can be watchful of that can alert you to a potentially toxic person or job in your life. If you are lucky enough to recognize these before being invested in a relationship, job, or group activity then congratulations! Unfortunately, it’s not always possible to spot – in fact, sometimes it can be very tricky. Here’s a short list of the most common signs to hep you recognize toxicity:
From a Person
- Constant negativity
- Lack of respect
- Excessive drama
- Seeking advice…but never acting on it
- Manipulation
- One sided relationship
- Shifting blame to everyone but themselves…always; it’s never their fault
- Gaslighting
From a Work Environment
- Energy draining
- Poor communication
- Exclusivity; clique-like behavior
- High turnover rate
- Lack of confidence in leadership
- Poor work-life balance
- Fear of retribution
- No clear career path/room for growth
Tips on Removing Toxicity from Areas of Your Life
Here are 8 effective strategies and practical tips that I have found useful in removing toxicity from my life. My hope is that they will be just as useful for you and help you to create a space that nurtures your well-being. The sooner you can begin implementing these strategies, the sooner you can release some of the toxins in your life. Let’s get started!
- Recognize Toxicity: The first step in removing toxicity is to identify it. Be honest with yourself and assess various aspects of your life. Reflect on your relationships, friendships, work environment, and daily routines. Look for signs of toxicity, such as the items listed above. Identifying these toxic elements is crucial in order to take the necessary steps to remove them.
- Set Boundaries: Establishing healthy boundaries is vital for maintaining a balance in your life. Clearly define what you will and will not tolerate in your relationships, both personal and professional. Communicate your boundaries (but you must be willing to enforce them!). Boundaries help to protect your mental and emotional well-being.
- Evaluate Relationships: Take a close look at your relationships and determine their impact on your life. Identify toxic relationships that drain your energy, undermine your self-esteem, or constantly bring unnecessary drama. Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive, and uplifting individuals is crucial for personal growth. It may be necessary to distance yourself from toxic people (or even cut ties completely) if the toxicity persists.
- Practice Self-Care: Self-care is a fundamental aspect of your well-being. Prioritize activities that bring you joy, relaxation, and rejuvenation. Engage in regular exercise, feed your body healthy foods, get enough sleep, and find hobbies that inspire and fulfill you. Taking care of yourself in this way will increase your resilience and make it easier to remove stressful influences from your life.
- Cultivate Positive Relationships: Seek out and nurture relationships with individuals who uplift and support you. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about your well-being and encourage personal growth. Positive relationships can serve as a strong foundation for your journey of removing toxicity and creating a healthier, happier life. You do not need a lot of these positive relationships. The quality of your relationships matter much more than the quantity.
- Pursue Personal Growth: Commit to your personal growth and self-improvement. Explore your passions, set achievable goals, and challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone. Engage in activities that boost your self-confidence and empower you to overcome toxic influences. Ongoing personal growth enhances your resilience and helps you navigate life’s challenges with greater clarity and purpose.
- Assess Your Work Environment: If your job is a significant source of toxic stress for you it’s important to evaluate your options. Consider whether the negativity stems from the work itself, your colleagues, your supervisor, or the overall work environment. Explore ways to improve the situation, such as addressing concerns with management, seeking a transfer within the organization, or even, in extreme situations, considering a career change. Remember, your mental and emotional well-being should not be compromised for the sake of a toxic job.
- Practice Mindfulness: Adopting a mindfulness practice can help you detach from negativity and stay centered. Cultivate self-awareness, observe your thoughts and emotions without judgment, and practice deep breathing, prayer, or meditation. Mindfulness can help you navigate challenging situations with a calmer and more focused mindset. This can make it easier to remove toxic people and elements from your life.
Easier Said Than Done
I know, I know. These tips are all well and good in theory. They make perfect sense and it all should be a no-brainer. But when you’re invested in a relationship that has turned toxic, or you’ve spent years at a company working your way up the corporate ladder, it can be extremely difficult to even want to address the problems, let alone do something about the problem to change it. It’s easier to keep things status quo and just complain about them from time to time to anyone who will listen. (Be careful that you do not become the toxic friend someone else needs to remove from their life!)
In case you may think I’m not speaking from experience here, I want to share that I have indeed had toxic people in my life and I’ve left more than one toxic job. The decision to leave those jobs (one of which I walked out on when my boss asked me to do something illegal!) is not always easy. There can be doubt about paying bills, finding another job and other very real concerns. Trying to mend a toxic friendship can bring it’s own set of challenges as well.
What Next?
I always favor discussing the situations and trying to improve them versus just walking out or severing ties without communication. The only exceptions to that being, as stated in the disclosure above, emergency situations, abuse, illegal activity, etc.
If attempts at communication concerns and trying to establish boundaries and guidelines for acceptable behavior do not garner the changes required, leaving the job or the relationship may be necessary for your well-being. Each situation is unique and I cannot make that kind of decision for you about what to do in each type of situation. It is up to you to weigh the pros and cons, determine what’s important to you and what you’re willing to accept from a person or job and then stick with your decision.
Conclusion
Removing toxicity from your life is a courageous and empowering journey. By recognizing toxic people and elements, setting boundaries, surrounding yourself with positive influences, and prioritizing self-care, you can create a healthier and more fulfilling life.
Remember, keeping your life a drama-free zone with limited toxic levels is an ongoing process that requires self-reflection, assertiveness, and a commitment to your own well-being. Embrace the journey, trust your instincts, and know that you deserve a life free from unnecessary drama and negativity.
Do you have toxic friends – or are you the toxic person? Do you think you work in a toxic environment? What have you done about it or what items from this list are you going to try? Leave a comment below or let’s discuss it on our social channels.